thedeathlymarshmallows

Not ‘gonna lie, it’s quite difficult to write an essay when my past self deemed it appropriate to take notes like this:

JANE AUSTEN - PErSuaSIoN!!!!1!!111!!

That one she wrote before she died innit

Sir Walter defo wants to bone Mrs. Clay but Anne is all up in his grill like “IT’S INAPPROPRIATE TO TAKE HER TO BATH”, but then Elizabeth smacks her down like “Shut up bitch don’t be a cockblock”
Basically the moral of the story is that literally everybody hates Mary, including her own father, because she’s a genuinely crud mother and has all the personality of a cowpat
Mrs. Musgrove has creys and nobody cares
Wentworth arrives at breakfast and has some EYe ConTaCT with Anne!!11!1 CALL THE MIDWIVES I’M SURE THERE’LL BE A BABY ON THE WAY IMMINENTLY
Louisa falls over and hits her head and everybody goes absolutely batshit insane, including the Captain’s who have been through wars, and Anne is the only sane person there and becomes like, the very embodiment of Wonder Woman who saves the day
Anne hates Bath appreciation 4 lyfe <3333
Mr. Elliot has also hopped on board the Hating On Mrs. Clay Club
Poor bb Clay
Nobody wants you to get any, do they?
Wentworth actually just wrote Anne a letter proclaiming his love
That is so bad
That’s the equivalent of texting it
‘@NNE W1LL U B MI GUURRLL LUV U B3TT3R TH@N 4EVA I LUV U 5EVAAA LOL TXT ITTT’
I’d slap him in the sideburns
Does he actually have sideburns
IMPORTANT: FIND OUT IF WENTWORTH HAS SIDEBURNS
ALSO IMPORTANT: PUT THE WORD ‘MOIST’ INTO YOUR ESSAY SOMEHOW
IF YOU DO YOU GET 10 GOLD STARS
…FROM YOURSELF
THERE’S NO BETTER PRAISE THAN SELF-PRAISE

14 notes